I Didn't Belong to You

JAMIE

By the time I was thirteen, my brother and Finn were getting ready to leave for college.

Will decided to have a little get-together with his friends for one last time before he left, and he was kind enough to let me stay. In return, I promised not to embarrass him in front of his friends.

I was happy because that meant I could spend a little more time with Finn. Unless that Nathalie girl showed up tonight as well.

I hated that girl.

I should probably go find something to wear for tonight! Maybe I could ask Kristen to help me with this? She always seemed to have good taste in clothes.

Before long I found myself in front of my brother’s bedroom door and, wasting no precious time, knocked hard to make sure he heard me.

“Jamie, what did I tell you about the way you knock on my door?” he snapped, opening the door. “I was in the middle of something.”

I peeked inside his room, only to see that he had been playing a video game. Sometimes I wondered who was really older between the two of us.

“Geez, sorry! Is Kristen with you? I wanted to ask her something.”

“She’s downstairs, helping Mom,” Will said in a calmer tone.

“Okay, thanks. Sorry for the door.”

“No, it’s okay. I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that. Need anything else?”

“Nope,” I said.

He nodded and closed the door—to return to his game, I guess.

I found Kristen downstairs. “Kristen, can you help me choose something to wear for tonight?” I asked.

“Of course, I will help you,” she replied. “If you want, I can also do your hair and makeup?”

“Okay! Come, we don‘t have time to waste then.” I took Kristen’s hand and led her to my room.

I was so excited. I was going to look so pretty, and Finn would be there to see it.

“Thank you for doing this,” I told Kristen. “I know you’ll help me look pretty.”

“It’s my pleasure. But you know you don’t need makeup to look beautiful. You look beautiful no matter what. So, let’s take a look at your wardrobe.”

She picked a cream blouse and matched it with a blue square-neck denim pinafore, knee-length socks, and black shoes. Let’s just say that the outfit, hair, and makeup for the night were perfect.

Once she was done helping me, Kristen went to my brother’s room to get ready.

Mom and Dad left to go out for the night after Will promised them at least a hundred times that he would take care of me and that nothing would happen while I was in his care.

“Can you get the door, Jamie?” Will asked me when we heard the doorbell ring.

“That’s why you said I could stay,” I grumbled. “So I could be your own personal butler!”

Unbelievable.

“Sister, you know I love you, but don’t start.”

Typical! I knew this was too good to be true.

But when I opened the door and found Finn on the other side, I decided I didn’t mind being the butler this once. I didn’t mind at all.

“Jem, fancy seeing you here,” Finn said with a smile on his face.

“You’re so funny!” I smiled back.

“Hey, what are you still doing standing in the doorway?” Nathalie asked, coming up behind Finn. “Oh, hey Janie,” she added, spotting me standing there with him.

“It’s Jamie!” I nearly snapped at her.

She deliberately ignored me, taking Finn’s hand and walking into my house.

I couldn’t understand what was so great about her to attract Finn’s attention. I mean, she seemed fake.

Why couldn’t I be the same age as them? Maybe then Finn would finally notice me.

Keep on dreaming. That will never happen.

I was right. I was the butler—always the one to open the door. Maybe it was a good thing. At least I didn’t have to see Finn kiss another girl.

Great, I sounded like I was jealous. Which I was—I loved him. I had to forget him. Things would be easier once he was gone. I wouldn’t have to see him that much.

Nope, also a lie. Just the thought of him leaving was breaking my heart. I would miss him.

Great, now I had to get myself to the bathroom before I embarrassed myself in front of everyone by bursting into tears. I hated being thirteen.

I decided to go to the one upstairs because no one was allowed there. The rules didn’t apply to me because I lived here.

I opened the bathroom door, only to see something I had definitely not expected. There, in front of me, Nathalie was kissing someone on the lips—someone who wasn’t Finn.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know.” I got out as quickly as possible.

Before I could even think of doing anything with this new information, Nathalie grabbed me by the elbow and pushed me against the wall—not hard enough to hurt me but enough to scare me.

“Listen here, you little missy, if you say anything to Finn, I will tell him how you truly feel about him,” she said. “What? You thought I didn’t notice the way you looked at him?”

I started to shake with fear—not because of her but because of her threat. I didn’t want Finn to find out, not like this.

“Careful, she’s Will’s little sister. I don’t want any problem with him.” The guy who Nathalie had been kissing in the bathroom came to my rescue—well, if you could call this a rescue.

“What the fuck is going on here? Let go of my sister, now!” I felt relieved to hear my brother’s voice.

“I’m out of here.” The guy tried to make a run for it.

“No, you stay right where you are,” Will demanded before turning to me. “Jamie?”

“Don’t tell me you’re going to listen to her. She’ll just lie,” Nathalie said to my brother.

“I’m tolerating you because you’re Finn’s girl. Don’t push me. Besides, my sister will never lie to me.”

“Hey, what’s going on here? The party is downstairs,” Finn said, joining us.

“Jamie, I’m still waiting for your explanation,” Will said, still looking at me.

My brother’s presence gave me the strength to speak. Glancing at Finn, I prayed that he would forgive me.

“I came up to go to the bathroom, and when I opened the door, I saw Nathalie kissing that guy and not in a friendly way. Then she grabbed me and pushed me against the wall and threatened me not to say anything.”

“Jamie, go to your room now!” Will ordered.

Looking at Finn, I could tell that he was mad as hell. I didn’t want to cause another scene, so I did exactly what my brother had asked me to do.

Kristen—who I realized must have come upstairs with Will—opened the door to my room and stepped inside with me.

“I made a mess, didn’t I?” I asked her.

“Don’t worry about it. How are you feeling?” she asked, taking a seat beside me.

“A little better.”

“To tell you the truth, I never liked Nathalie,” she said. “I don’t know what Finn sees in her. At least he got to know the truth about her before he left for college.”

I took her hand in mine, thinking that if I had a sister I would have liked her to be like Kristen. My brother had found a good one.

“Do you think he’s mad at me?” I asked, referring to Finn.

Before she could answer me, a knock sounded on my door. Kristen let go of my hand and went to open the door before stepping outside and letting Finn in.

I couldn’t look at him, so I decided to keep my eyes trained on the floor instead.

“Jamie, look at me,” he said once he was seated beside me.

No Jem. He must be mad at me.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered as a single tear escaped my eyes.

He grabbed my chin so I would look at him. “You have nothing to apologize for. None of this is your fault.” He wiped my tears with his thumb and kissed my forehead.

“Now I better go before your brother comes in here and kicks my ass for entering your room.”

“So you aren’t mad at me.”

“I can never be mad at my Jem.” With that, he left my room.

How could I ever stop loving him when he was so nice to me?